Up another early morning not able to sleep after Maggie needed help going to the bathroom in the middle of the night and my mind activated again. I feel the days getting very close and I feel unprepared. In the last week, I've experienced lots of changes in my pregnancy and the signs are pointing to labor being a few days away to still being out 2-4 weeks. I was ok initially with being at work until that point, now I feel like hunkering down and staying close to home if my days are numbered. I will probably go on leave early and try to relax as much as possible. According to my midwife, having a baby at 36 weeks is safe but it has a few more complications that go along with it. Keep the baby in another week or two!
The realization that hit me last night is that if this baby really is close, I might miss out on some of the last minute things I had planned for March. Belly cast from hubby on Valentine's Day, family photos before birth, getting room set up how I wanted (this didn't matter to me the entire time even though I was collecting things...must be a nesting thing right now), and other little things I haven't checked off the list yet. I know it will all work itself out but now my priorities are changing from what is necessity and what is fun? Ok, go! Ay yay yah. My sister reminded me last night, after we celebrated her 30th birthday (had to document all of this because I don't journal except here and we have lots of big changes happening in our family right now as my sister is also preparing for a big move and I end the night with a momentous late night call), that this baby will come when he's ready and that he will be a totally different being than my Maggie. It's a wierd thought in some ways because I have no other frame of reference other than to compare this experience to Maggie's pregnancy, labor patterns, birth, and everything that followed and the differences are throwing me for a loop. I need a day to recoup :-)
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